Dating With Your Brain

Do you know that your brain can also affect your love life? Dr. Jason Shepherd, a neurophysicist in the Department of Brain and Cognitive Sciences at M.I.T., provides some helpful dating tips in a scientific perspective. Note that his views do not necessarily reflect those of the institute.

Be aware that you are clueless – According to Dr. Shepherd, many of our most important decisions are made unconsciously. We receive so many sensory inputs, but our conscious experience captures only a small percentage of this information. It is natural for chemistry and attraction occur without us really knowing, which is why we often end up wondering why we are drawn to certain people.

Be appealing to women by being intelligent – The brains of men and women are wired differently. While men are generally attracted to what they see, women choose their partners in a “cerebral” manner. This makes men who are not so lucky in the looks department end up dating the most beautiful girl in the crowd by being funny and smart.

Learn from “feedback loops” – Everything you do is noted by the brain with the help of its “feedback loops,” which can be located everywhere in this vital organ. Doing something that activates a reward system, such as going on a good date, provides molecular changes in the reward system that reinforces that good experience. In a neurophysiologist’s perspective, “love” is the end result of positive reinforcement of these reward circuits. However, just because you know what goes on in your brain that causes you to fall in love, does not mean you are not falling in love.

Know your dealbreakers – Before going on a date, be sure you know what turns you off. Clearly state on your dating profile your likes and what you cannot tolerate. It may turn off many potential daters, but you surely get quality responses.

Respect is key – Although chemistry and attraction is needed among couples, the relationship will not work without respecting each other’s intellect, drive, etc. Even if the sparks do not fly and there is no prospect for a second date, how you respect your date can be remembered.

Source:, via Sun Herald

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